permutates | 01st transformation . video . locks for erik & charles

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01st transformation . video . locks for erik & charles

[ She greets the barge with a smile. Her appearance is 'normal' - normal for a human. No blue skin or yellow eyes in sight. ]

Hi. [ And a little wave. She regrets it immediately. That's kind of embarrassing, isn't it? And not something that she should be doing, because she's here for a purpose. ] I'm Raven.

I heard a few of my friends were here, so I thought I'd come… help. I'm a warden.

And I'm here because I really believe that even if you're trapped, you still should have a chance to figure out who you are. I think that's important.

[ locked to Erik ]

Well, you thought I was crazy for trying, but I found you.

[ locked to Charles ]

[ She considered her approach to this for a long time. There are a lot of things that they should probably say to each other, and she's supposed to be responsible here. She can't just avoid him, as much as she wants to, while she gets her head together. ]

You should know that I'm here.

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That's not what I meant. Every few weeks, the Barge "makes port" in a different world for a few days, and sometimes, both wardens and inmates are stripped of any supernatural abilities they possess without any prior warning. Not every port is dangerous, but we've been to a few that are, and you're not always guaranteed to have your abilities to fall back on to help you survive.

[He chews at his lip for a moment, wondering how likely it is that Erik will say something, or Alex, whether it comes out carefully or in the heat of the moment. He doesn't want it to be something that's shouted at her, or blurted out against anyone's will, and so long as they're laying it all out on the table... he might as well.] One in particular was especially bad. It was before my spine had been healed, and the ship crash landed on a world that inhabited by a race of hostile aliens called the Vanquish. A vast majority of people on the Barge were kidnapped and tortured, and we had no idea if the people back on the ship would be able to get us out in time. We were there for four days.

["We" meaning he was one of them, and there's a hollowness in his expression and voice that suggests he's actively trying to distance himself from what happened, and doesn't want to talk about the details. It still hurts more than he'd like to admit it does, and while he knows he's always going to have to live with it, he still doesn't want to.]

I'm not going to tell you you should go home, and I'm not telling you this because I want you to be afraid. I want you to be prepared, because God knows I wish someone had warned me about some of this before it happened.

[ A lot happens in two years. She reminds herself of this over and over, stony-faced, as he tells her.

At least he did tell her. ]

But being afraid can be useful, can't it?

[ He's always been the one that tells her about the dangers. That makes her afraid, in a twisted-up way. ]

I'm stronger than you think.

And I'm tired of being afraid. [He hadn't really meant to say it out loud, but it was true. He'd give anything, to go back to before that had happened, and while their most recent port adventure had made him feel more in control of his life than he had in a long time, it didn't erase what had happened.]

Has anyone told you about floods or breaches, yet?

[ And she's been tired of being afraid since before he found her. She resists the urge to tell him congratulations for catching up - it would be mean. ]

Not in detail.

Breaches happen fairly infrequently, and you're effectively swept into the reality of some other universe and think you've lived an entirely different life from the one you're used to. A similar occurrence can happen during ports, but breaches affect everyone, and the Barge itself. Floods are more regular, and they have extremely varied effects. Not everyone is affected, and there's no way to determine who will be or what changes the flood will create before hand. Sometimes you'll find yourself bursting into song for no apparent reason, or everyone will be animals, or think you've lived a completely different life because you never met someone important to you, or you'll swap places with someone from back home. They usually only last a few days.

... I switched placed with you, for a few days last year. I don't remember much of the details, but there will probably be some people who'll recognize you from that.

The Admiral lets this happen?

[ This is a little horrifying to her. ]

[It's horrifying to everyone, Raven. B(]

I don't think he has any control over it. But he's not a very good man to work for regardless.

Edited 2013-07-21 16:49 (UTC)

I didn't think he would be. Not if he can reward that much.

[It's sort of a relief to hear that she's at least got some realistic expectations of how this is going to go, because God knows he hadn't really known what to expect at all when he'd first shown up here.]

You're also very likely to run into people who know some other version of you from their world. From what I've heard, none of us are very much like our counterparts, and it can take people quite a while to warm up to that fact.

How do you know?

That you're not like them.

[ There's a lot in her. Emotions that can take different forms, appear different ways. She could be happy. She could be angry forever. And she could seem like anything. ]

Because Erik doesn't murder children, you haven't posed as a high school principal to terrorize humans, and I didn't go bald at age ten.

I haven't what?

[He smiles a little wanly.] Like I said, we're quite different from what some of the people here expect us to be.

But why would I do that? There has to be more of a point.

I don't know. The girl who told me about it refused to go into detail, and she left quite a while ago.

[ She isn't sure how much she buys this. Bald at age ten isn't a character feature. Murdering children... well, she's seen the anger inside of Erik, and how much of a stretch is it, really, to go that far?

And a situation without detail like that...

Her doubt is visible on her face. ]

[He shrugs.] You don't have to believe me. But once people start telling you details of your life that you're completely unfamiliar with - like we were never siblings, Moira's supposed to be a Scottish geneticist, I met Erik in Israel while we were volunteering at a clinic together - it gets easier to accept. They've lived completely different lives than we have.

Oh.

[ Well, that makes a difference. The sibling thing. ]

[Maybe she'll like it better than way. B(]

Erik and I live down the hall, if you ever need us for anything.

I don't plan on avoiding you.

[He's not sure what to make of that, and he still doesn't know where he really stands with her. It's not like she's been particularly clear.]

Alright.

I don't know what it's going to be like, Charles. If you're looking for clearer answers, I can't give them.

[He feels like he should go. He's said everything he'd needed to, and he feels tired and drained and just wants to get away from other people for a while.]

Do you have any other questions?

No.

I didn't think this would be easy, either. Or happy.

Charles - when you rescued me, it was a fairy tale. Nothing in my life will ever be that perfect.

[He doesn't know what to say. He's wondered more than once if he'd made a mistake when he'd offered her a home, if he should have found somewhere where she'd have parents and more than just him to keep her company, especially when his mother had really started to decline. It feels like this is just proof that he'd made a mistake, that he'd tried too hard to be everything for her, and it was his fault.]

I'm sorry. [It's quiet, and too emotional for his liking, but it's the only thing he can really think to say. He can feel the familiar want to just completely shut down beckoning, and there's a part of him that does desperately want to give into it, but he can't do that here.

There's another part of him that desperately wants to lean on Erik, but he feels pathetic and stupid for thinking it, and gets to his feet before he starts considering his options further.]

Let me know if you need anything.

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permutates - 2013-07-21 22:31 (UTC) - Expand

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